There seems to be a very thin between love and hate. Sometimes so thin that you cant difference.

That is curtainly my experince at the moent, and has been for a while.

I got thinking about love and hate because its coming up to Valentines Day and i got asked what i would be doing for it. If i had my way, hiding from now till a couple of days after it with no tv, radio etc, talking about how to have a great night on a budget, what gift to give that special person, etc.

This will be hte first Valentines Day in a long time i will have with no one to say i love you to. No one to talk to about plans for the future. Its a hard thing to come to terms with that your not going to wake up and be with that special person on that day. Although while i was with my ex we never celebrated Valentines day since out anniversery was two days later. Meant we could do all the lovely dovey stuff at half the price where we wanted to without having to book weeks or months in advance.

Anyway, poets and writers make much of love and hate. With out love and hate they would have little to write about. there would be no journey to find the one for the novelist, or a reason to try and find the right words to express your passion for someone.

Just as without hate there wouldnt be a need for dective novels and dark poems like the raven to read and make us feel better about our own lives and situation.

Love and hate as words are so over used in this day and age. There was a time when you would only say you love when you where talking to the one you were marrying or your children. Now it just doesnt seem to be enough to say we like something, its i love it. Which makes the word lose its meaning every time it is used in that context.

Hate is also a very powerful word and seems to be used even more often then lvoe when talkiong about things. We say oh i hate that woman, or that football team or even that type of food. Not really paying attention to the word we are using.

I get accused of hating people because of their roles in people i care about lives, thats really not te case. i dont think i have ever once said i hate that person, when i have been accused of hating them. Half the time  havent met them yet and am working of bits and pieces of information about them, like hearing one thing about them on one day and the complete opposite the next. or being told that person doesnt want a certain role in a little person life, but the little person is insistant that he has been told otherwise and that he should see this person in that role.

Hate or feelings similar to it come about through lack of information, lack of empthy and just plain old lets make someone hurt. We all do things e’re not proud of. Things we could take back if we could. But never would we want them to lead to feelings of hate towards ourselves. And, if we truely cared about anyone we wouldnt want to cause them to hate us.

My three year old son doesnt use the word hate. In fact i’m not even sure if he had heard it in realtion to anything before he over a row. Instead of saying i hate this, that or the other he’ll say i dont like it.

He only ever uses the word love when he talking about his feelings for people like me and his granddad. He doesnt say i love theses shoes like a lot of women are want to, he’ll say he likes them.

His father an i have been careful to not teach him to hate other football teams from his own, he instead says he likes them or doesnt like them, or in the case of man u they are bad.

It just shows that when he says he loves you, he really means it as in his head thats the most positive he can feel about you. the word and the emotion arent rendered meaningless by over use in his world. As aduults we need to learn from that and make sure that when use love we really mean it and its in realtion to people, not things.

Feelings of love can turn into feelings of hate through a wrong word or a bad deed. just as feelings of hate can be turned into positive feelings if not love by a word and deed.

I recently recieved an email from someone i had emailed out of concern over someone i loved and even though we never really saw eye to eye and he believes i dont like him he only had nice things to say to me, and it made me stop and think about how i felt towards him. i Dont really know the guy. what i do know of him is bits an pieces told by someone else and through some of his actions which i learn he made whilst unwell.

I ame to realize that i had proberly got this person wrong and that maybe when i had the chance to get to know him better i should have done. Now its soo late for that and i may have missed out the chance of having another friend, someone else in my life who just wants to look out for the two people i love most as things stand. For that i am truely sorry and just hope that its something i can learn from so i dont lose out on some one who is a nice person full of love for people and life again.

Advertisements