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Cat fight in downing street.

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Yes you heard right.

 

Theres been a cat fight in Downing street. And it’s appeared on the news as a lead story!

Now the fight wasnt between any two cats. It was between the Prime Ministers cat and the Chancellors cat.

Again it’s not really big news.

Unless you take into account that the PMs cat is well-known for just laying about sleeping. disappointing the residents of Downing street as it was meant to be a rat catcher.

Yep they managed to find the only cat who’s lazier then Garfield!

 

 

The cat was only bought because a few times during live broadcasts from outside number ten there where large rats running about.

So after this cat proved himself to be a lazy cat the cancellors cat was moved into the street. Rat problem sorted.

they’ve been living together quite happily for a year and then the other night the chancellors girl cat turned round and cat punched the PMs cat. all in front of the policeman who’s thankless task it is to just stand outside the door of number 10.

No one stepped in to stop the fight. instead they did what every these days seem to do, take pictures and put them online.

So why is this a big story?

Well historically the residents of numbers 10 and 11 Downing Street have found it very hard to get on. Often refusing to talk to each other, unless there really is nothing else they can do.

So newscasters are now trying to say because the cats are fighting there must be something going on between their masters.

Me thinks their trying to make a mountain out of a mole hill.

Cats in my experience can be cuddled up to one another one minute fighting the next and back to cuddling the one after.

People must be really desperate to see something happening between Cameron and Osborne other than brown-nosing each other all the time.

To be perfectly honest I wouldn’t be surprised if in the back rooms of numbers ten and 11 they have manikin’s of each other they beat up so they can keep the “we’re best mates” act going in public.

Can we have some proper news now this silly story has done the rounds for a few days?

 

Some how I don’t think it’ll happen any time soon.

Back at Collage.

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So its been a couple of months since I last wrote on here.

During that time I finished the last course I wrote about, still waiting for the certificates to arrive.

For the past six weeks I’ve been doing a maths and english functional skills course.

I did manage to get my English GCSE but not my maths.But. since its been over five years since I got my GCSE’s I was told I needed to do the english part of the course.

Yes you heard right. after five years you should do your GCSE’s again as they are meaningless. Wish they told me that during my time at school. Wouldnt have stressed so much during school if I had known.

So at the butt crack of dawn I walked into the classroom six weeks ago not knowing who I was going to met or if I was even going to last the full day.

Not only did I last the full day, I also made three good mates from the course.

Turns out spending the first week of the course doing nothing but icebreaker games is the best way to met people and find things in common. Even if it’s just how boring and what a waste of time doing the ice breakers are!

By week two I had met a lad and we got together. sadly it only lasted as a real relationship for four weeks. Now we’re just enjoying being around each other till we’re both ready to be in a proper relationship.

We did kinda rush into it.

Anyway getting back to the course.

The english side of it isn’t too bad. We really are learning something, even if it just learning how bad we are at spelling and grammar.

The maths on the other hand is a completely different story.

We are learning what is called new maths. Which basically means that everything we were taught in school is wrong.  And instead of doing sums the simple way that any idiot or young child can follow we’re drawing stupid charts and pictures to work out the answer.Often getting the answer wrong, when we were getting it right doing it the way we were taught in school.

And the questions are a total joke.

We have been given questions to do that have appeared on past exam papers and i gotta say, going off the handpicked questions we have been given I have great doubts that anyone passed the exam.

One example is from a question we had yesterday.

There is a recipe laid out and the amount of ingredients needed to make it. But half way through the question it changed from the amount being for two portions to one. so when we questioned the teacher she had to get the answer book out and another teacher to look at it with her to say that we should work it out as the amount being for one portion. so by this point half of us had already worked out the answers as if it was for two portions given how large the amounts are.
That’s not even the worst example but just that question is enough to make me get a bit angry over how stupid it all is. I’m there to learn and get a qualification. But as things stand the questions mean I could answer it right how it reads and fail the exam. which would be a waste of my time and everyone else’s who are sitting/marking the exam.

Oh well I sit the exam a week on Monday. Hopefully the people who wrote the last few exams have been fired and they have new people who know who to keep the numbers the same during a two-line question.

Wish me luck